When I fly across the sky~

2010-08-29T09:01:00.001-07:00

*this photo is purposely generated to demonstrate "the rain" w/o considering the quality of it.

It's easy to capture something motionless.

Today, I tried to capture the rain, the tears of the sky. They are just too fast and furious hitting on the floor.

The rain,

It looks like they are celebrating their release;

It looks like a water ball fight, see who can throw it harder from the sky;

It looks like the obstacles, one after another, hitting deep in the heart like how they hit the floor and the rooftop;

Life is easy, what's difficult is what you want to achieve in your life.

Life is never hard, only your heart that makes it seems so hard because you have so much dreams.

Life is fragile, the harder you hit it, more difficult your life will become for you to go through the cracks and the obstacles formed by yourself.

2010-08-26T21:56:00.000-07:00

If one day I become a doll with no motion and emotion, will I still be able to see how blue the sky is and feel how warm is a sunny day.

One day when I am already numb with the silent night and the loneliness, it only means I have grown up to be able feel the movement of the earth.

2010-08-22T22:09:00.000-07:00

I am brave

I heard them saying about the earth. And how enormous the whales are, swimming in Alaska where people are having tours to see them and to admire their beauty. I heard about the Safari Wildlife where humans are chasing huge herds of zebra, various antelope and wildebeest and elephant too which I heard I need hours to climb around it. I remember, my mum told me, the land that I am walking on now is called "cactus". Humans fear it for its thorns and animals who tried to invade it or to destroy it are usually hurt and run away with thorns on their body. I am proud to say that I am brave enough to have walked on it for days and with my intelligence and the small body that I am given, I have no fear for it. Going left and right but never stop forwarding, I have completed half of my journey. Maybe sometimes my existence is forgotten but i have no fear to go forward with what's gifted to me especially the no fear in me~~

The perfect moment~

2010-08-22T05:43:00.000-07:00

New life~

What's precious in a human being? Growing old does not matter, what matters is in the process of growing, we give hope, life, laughter to others while getting at the same time.

Ant on the cactus

Sometimes things can be so small in our eyes but we have to remember that among all the creations of the God, the small thing can be big or even huge for others. Learn to appreciate everything around us.

Thorniness

Some experience can be really hurtful, that's when we're careless. What's important is we have the courage to move on and not fearing what's waiting for us ahead.

When it is time to move on~~

I think this is what we call as leaving the past behind and move on with new hope and new look.

The power of nature~

2010-07-22T07:11:00.000-07:00

My job is to catch the beauty around and put them in your dreams~~ =)

The love flies across the sea, across the sky...

2010-07-17T08:16:00.000-07:00

It leaves no traces along the journey but at the end of the road, it digs deep and rest well in the heart of the place where it is meant to be sent to.

心情还好么?我问废话."我心情不好"已写在你脸上.怎么了?为情困扰?你是不会和我说的了,我知道,我也明白.不管发生什么事,不要退缩,因为你还没尝试过又怎么知道不可能?
不要害怕受伤,因为凡事都会有得失.有时持着只会带来错过.我的确不知,什么事会带给你那么大的困扰,我也认识你没多久.朋友不会生气像你这么好的人,最多只是和你赌赌气,吃小醋,那是因为你对他们来说很重要.可我们自己却一直猜测对方是否不在乎了.这才是人类阿!你知道吗?你不开心,有很多人的心情是随着你而变的.你阿你阿,有时候也顾虑太多了,没办法你就是那么伟大.孤单因人而异,但往往能让你觉得孤独的人都是你深爱的人.人丫,一年比一年大,顾虑的东西越来越多.我相信你可以把所有事处理得很好.对你来说或许我只是一位朋友,但对我来说你比谁都来得重要就像家人一样.如果站着真的很累,那你怎么不尝试坐下呢?
I still love you!remember you still have friends,family!They always can lend you theirs shoulder,a hug.So don't force yourself to face the problem by yourself if you can't.Everyone needs help,sue yin too.Cheer up and i am sure you can handle it well.cheerio dear!

Thanks little monster...I wish you won't grow up/old so fast coz as you grow older, that's when I run out of ideas how to make you happy and keep you safe then you are the one who has to do that to me! But I guess, you are already doing so...=) Anyway, thanks =).

我是一只小小鸟

2010-07-14T07:20:00.000-07:00

A song that I love but somehow it never touch my heart like how this version has really moved me. Ding Dang!!!

云~~

2010-07-10T08:40:00.000-07:00

云，不留痕迹的飘过，在乎的只是曾经穿梭那蔚蓝的天空。

Will it be just like that?

2010-07-06T20:57:00.000-07:00

Will today end just like that again?

Like how I have grown up to be my mum big little girl?

Like how the sun rises every morning and how it set again every evening?

Like how the rain pour heavily or maybe just dizzling?

Rainbow comes after raining,

Sunrise and sunset are always beautiful,

it always turn out to be the scenery to be appreciated,

and I have turned out fine to be my mum's big good little girl

I have learnt to look at the bright side of everything once I open my eyes every morning.

An origami box~~

2010-07-05T23:49:00.000-07:00

When we get older, when we have started to see life, we are more carefree? We see less of the little details of our life...

A little boy was sitting in front of me while I was reading, he is my sister's student. My guess, he is 7. "Have you cut your finger nails?" my sis asked. He stood up and walked to his bag. He came back with the nail cutter and a paper folded which I first thought to be a bag, then he expanded it and made it into a paper box. Then he started to cut his nails and put them in the box before throwing it in the dustbin.

I am much more careless than that~~Erm...

6 days after landing in Changi Airport, I am still here in Johor Bahru which is just a bridge away from Singapore. Almost everyday, I wake up at 3 a.m. and can only spend time in the room reading "The book of Negroes". The book reminds me of the thought I had in Dubai Airport when I was shopping there at 3 a.m. with Sharmilah.

"This is a place where there is no day and night, this is a place where everyone carries a different stories, some are going home while others are leaving for good."

Home is the starting point for everyone, no matter where you are going or what you are trying to achieve, one day somehow you will be home again.

When you look into someone's eyes or face, what do you see?

What do you think?

Everyone has a story~~is it worth sharing the story?

Sharing is refused when you are looking into a stranger's eyes...

Humans,

No matter where you are looking at, you are only searching for a familiar face to share the story of your life.

It has been 5 days I am back in Malaysia~

2010-07-04T22:16:00.000-07:00

Plan is yet to be made.

Thing has been done and the unexpected has happened. Learnt the lesson to not to doubt myself again but to just do it. Wasted too much time in thinking and planning but not in doing it. I guess I am not a good planner. No, I am never a good planner but I should learn. From now on, plan has to be made and to be followed.

Wake up to read, and to get ready.

Can't be the best but I can be good. Maybe not in what I thought I can be but in what I am going to be. No more indulging myself in all kind of imagination but to pull myself back into reality.

*to remind myself*

My name is Chuah Sue Yin and there is lots to be done.

The value of a human being~

2010-04-21T09:47:00.000-07:00

Humans are always priced, how much you are cost as a human being is depending on how much you are capable in providing, how much you can be used...

Humans describe themselves as the greatest creation of the God and at the same time, they label each other...

Today I realised my value...if to be compared to someone else, undeniable the person is more valuable than me...

Saying hi~~

2010-04-18T14:45:00.000-07:00

18th Apr 2010,

Dear sunshine Dear Sunday, you are leaving as the vapor escaping from my cup of hot lemon tea...

Thermos by thermos of good Indian Masala Tea on the friday night followed by a teapot of milk tea on the Saturday's with a beautiful full stop for the beautiful Sunday with a cup of hot lemon tea... the last weekend of Easter holiday is saying goodbye.

Life is always beautiful and it becomes more beautiful when life was once ugly and disappointing. Courage and support make it more meaningful as you realised that there are more than a person in your life. By the time you found another sunshine in it, you will see your life as a cup of hot lemon tea, so much sweetness with the good aroma from the lemon. It is sour but it is always good to go with your cup of hot tea.

Say hi to everything that you are afraid of because they make you stronger as time goes on.

当未来变成模糊~~

2010-02-27T05:14:00.000-08:00

选择和对未来的打算会变成是一种奢侈，

想要做的一切，弥补的一切

也只能是如果这一切都没发生的可能；

是时候停止脚步，不再追逐未来，

建立起面对现在的勇气，勇敢的面对彼此，

面对一切可能；

祝福，你只需要一个，多了，就感谢和感激，

你不是一个人，因为我们有个大树的承诺，永远都不离开，

离开了也会再回来~

After sooo long~~

2010-02-26T15:42:00.000-08:00

(Thinking of lil.B, come on! I am waiting for you to stand up again!! Just like you, I am striving too so U R NOT ALONE!! Remember?? We are the cave neighbours!!)

Mum's word: No matter how people is treating you, you must treat people well.

Yes mummy! =) and

to my dear papa, Happy BIRTHDAY!!! ( I am a good girl, i failed to get a cake delivered back home but at least I got to wish him 10mins before the day, okay, nothing to be proud of.) haha! Nyway, thanks for saying you want to give me money to buy a DSLR now....but I wish my very 1st DSLR is bought with my own money...

I have to give up the plan again this time... =.= haiz...but never mind~~ =') Allow me to say bubye to Canon 500D again, it flies away again this time, sometimes I have to let go larrr...@(>.<)@ sad and not in the mood for a few days but now, back in action(=.=" for what??!!)!! I know I will get it one day!! =')

Let's get some Maths talk going on, (it's 12am...recalling what is interesting~~)

Curve- in english, it is simply a curve but in Maths, it is so much more... It is a word used to describe a piecewise smooth function defined on an interval. "Curve" can be used to describe the image of such map(maps of the piecewise smooth function) too.

- It is crucial not to get confused. In maths, it makes sense if we say a curve is parametrised by a curve. (In conclusion, know the curve by the curve in english and not maths to make life easier.)

What is a complete metric space?

Let (X,d) be the metric space and let E be a subset of X. Then E is complete if for any Cauchy sequence of points in E, there exists a point in E such that the Cauchy sequence tends to the point.

- We say that if E is complete then E is closed.

"We have to prove that if there is a limit point in X where E is subset of X then x is contained in E if E is complete, and therefore E is closed. We use the uniqueness of the limit point to show that when there is a x in X and y is in E(since E is complete, there is a limit point of the Cauchy sequence in E known as y by the definition of completeness), so x=y."

- If X is complete and E is closed, then E is complete.

"Take a sequence in E. Since X is complete, the sequence is a Cauchy sequence and the sequence converges to a point in X. Since E is closed so it contains all its limit points and therefore, there is a Cauchy sequence in E which converges to a point in E and therefore E is complete."

and bla, bla, bla~~(suddenly the laziness creeps in..) so

TATA...

Love the library for some reasons~

2010-01-14T03:02:00.000-08:00

No matter where I am, I wish I have a little room for myself besides my room with a bed in it. In the college, I shared a little room in the academic block with Jie. That's where we studied and rot~ haha! We always go to the cafe to get some food before we started our days there till late night before exam. We studied then we stopped to rest, to eat and to laugh before we buried our heads again in the pile of past year exam papers and chemistry formula. During dinner time, we met lil.B and we talked east and west. If we're "lucky" enough on that day, we will see the pair of BEST FRIEND in the college, Raj(after coming to the UK, our Thavarajah demands his friends to call him Raj=,=") and Gid then our Raj will be the loudest in the dining hall. haha!! :P I missed those days but I am happy with these days too~where we will keep in touch with each other sometimes and I bet no one will talk about old days now but ya, because I am writing so somehow I am drifted back to the memory lane where I will see most of you.

I asked lil.B a question, whether I should choose the subjects according to my interest or if it is easy to be scored in the exam? He said he can't really answer it. So, I go back to my own dilemma. I am pretty sure about my choices now. It is supported by my tutor. Deep in my heart, I have the desire to learn more but I know my capility is limited.

I have learnt one thing, it is better to be good in what you are doing rather than trying to know everything. And, do not fear to learn everything when you are already good in what you are doing.

That's what I have to do now,

To be good in what I am doing.

Maths of the day:
(i) From F.S.& BFS, OS& BOS
Def, thm, proof-(Done)
*What leads to contradict the statement can be used to be contradicted in the way to achieve what has to be proven.

2010-01-13T13:44:00.000-08:00

No matter how dark is the moment,
love and hope are always possible.
-George Chakiris-

40 mins before going out for classes~

2010-01-11T23:50:00.000-08:00

Had a gray night...Good morning to me and kinda can't wait to finish up this week's old timetable. Not because I am not going to have any morning lectures after this, mainly because I want to start doing revision more than being stuck in lecture hall now for these 4 subjects. But, new topics are still there hanging around waiting to be learned. So ya, en2 en2 Sue Yin Chuah!!

=.= soooo....

1st, some useless human being from Aus made a conclusion that I am a calculating, foxy, manipulative, double-faced evil girl. YOU better watch out!! Gonna rob you one day when I step into Aus~

2nd, I can't stop laughing when you are trying to make me feel better. I was thinking of how you look like whenever you argue with us!! haha~~ soli la...And, I mean it when I say that, I don't mean to laugh at them. LOL~~~

3rd~~No more.

Time to go really~~

p/s: I am eating sweet potato porridge for my breakfast.

2010-01-11T14:24:00.000-08:00

Sharing is caring.

Did someone say this only applies to happiness?

~End of story~

2010-01-10T12:41:00.000-08:00

By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.
Benjamin Franklin

In the affairs of this world, men are saved not by faith, but by the want of it.
Benjamin Franklin

Flickr just told me a secret~~

2010-01-10T09:43:00.000-08:00

My camera is a POINT&SHOOT type!!! HAHAHAA >.<

Getting excited, loving, feeling enthusiastic to start writing in maths language again. Had a good start and can't wait to have more. Feeling excited about getting a MEAN lecturer for my new subject in the new term(starting next week)~~

Losing a bit of senses in receiving the meaning of life, the meaning of a smile and of course the meaning of silence~~

While I am still trying to know this Thai guy who is an exchange student from US, he stopped talking to me for some reasons which I am not informed about. The weird thing is we talked a lot last time and now he can't even knock on my door to give me back my calculator~~Erm...okay, I got it, you don't like me *shake head*..haha!! :D haiz...

Right, I read an article on "How to combat the natural tendency on procrastinate" and thinking of how I have let my card to be suspended for the 2nd time for a few days now. It is kinda out of the definition of procrastination(because it is A BIG MATTER) but THIS IS THE BLOODY 2ND TIME my card got suspended!! and so, thing got a bit UNPLEASANT and BORING(Llyods!! you!!!)!! So~~I do need to know how to combat it. (I don't know how to make a disappointed smile but that's what I am doing...) OHH YEAA... I have lost the ability to write something meaningful, chilling and aspiring!!

so, L.Boonie, don't you think it's boring to read my blog?? duhhh~~~

I can feel that days are moving really fast now~~

2010-01-09T12:28:00.000-08:00

They are moving even faster when it gets dark really early in the winter. (=.=")

I tried living without looking at the clock but just looking at my books and chatting with friends. Worked well and I saw well, the purpose of me doing so? Just to get a feeling of not letting myself chasing the time but just following the flow of it~ Erm...

I remembered myself waking up on the 8th Jan and I started my day as usual. Nothing special happened, only that I started playing badminton again after one month of traveling, walking, laughing, chatting and meeting dear friends.
Went to The Body Shop, attempted to grab products on sale(been told they are REAL cheap) but ended up buying all the products which are not discounted =.=". Combined this with what have been gone through by our little Boonie who went for Boxing day but ended up buying 50% of things which are not discounted, I made a conclusion that this is their technique and apparently they are very successful in doing so. Erm...I called myself a Sale-victim(defined as the customers who are attracted to buy products which are not on sale during sale).

Downloaded and watched a movie, The Time traveler's wife. A very nice and romantic story, following up is I am going to start reading the book. (To explain the situation, I learned better when I have an image in my head. That's why I loved drawing, now I love photographing :D) Next, chatted with someone who constantly reminded me during the conversation to watch AVATAR and MUST watch it in the cinema!!

Then, ISOLATED SINGULARITY, LAURENT SERIES, TAYLOR SERIES.

Isolated singularity is as the name sounds like, it is like a person who is isolated and refused to be given the same opportunity as his friends who are living in the neighborhood. As the friends has the properties of making f holomorphic. Furthermore, the person does not know how to differentiate f!! Therefore, we named him, ISOLATED SINGULARITY.

Laurents series and Taylor series?? They are just TWO series...hahaha! :D

Then I got confused with the name, Leibniz Test and Lipchitz properties~~ but figured out later and laughed at myself the whole hour.

Talked to jiejie, happy that I successfully downloaded the movie for her and of course as usual, she helped me in understanding my calculus notes~~ Thanks Jie.

Had a good time chatting with L. Boonie(stands for little Boonie :P) (Wow, you might be more popular with this name among~~u know who!!haha). Great stories and of course, now he realised that I am "good" analyst! "Thanks" for clip, can't stop "thank"ing you now~~~ =.=""

Fixed my Flickr, happy that it looks better now~~
http://www.flickr.com/photos/sueyin_photos/

Fixed the website that I helped to build for my Maths teacher~~ Looking good now but do not have the time to follow it up, feel a bit guilty about that. Soon~~soon when I have the time, I will...
http://pendangmathsoc.yolasite.com/

Then I went to sleep, woke up a few hours later. Very sleepy~~ but ya, woke up for more revising work. Life can't be more interesting?? Work, eat and play clips in front of me while I am trying to work to keep me awake...

Decided to have a little break and I lied down on the bed, then I had a look outside the window...What a beautiful view and what a wonderful sky~~

(Wai~ You have been back for 2 days and I had 2 sunny days~~ :P)

Cooked porridge for myself and had steamed fish with the porridge. Then after a little bit of work, can't stand the silence in my room and so I watched another movie called Crash.

Old movie, 05 production, watched it before in the college during IELTS class and love it as it left a very deep impression. It is all about life and how others are actually looking at us when we're different. The difference indicates racial discrimination. We're scared because we are different but we become more scary when we're trying to protect ourselves. We even become more evil when we think others are doing bad things to us. No matter how the situation is treating us, remember to love~

Now, I am writing this and I should continue working. Finally, I look at the time, 11.21pm~~9th Jan.

Wai!! Drink water~~~

2010-01-05T18:15:00.000-08:00

"Jie, we must live happily."(Translated from Mandarin)

Wai, I never stop being happy or trying to do things to make myself happy. Everyone has their own way to find happiness. I never try to make myself unhappy too. I will never do that. Jo jie always tell me, treat yourself better, sayang yourself more. Jo jie, I know and I am.

I hope I am a good host so far to my little sister who is now sleeping soundly behind me... I always see her as my little sis even tho she is not really my little sis, haha :D but she is one happy girl. Do not ever try to take away the smile from her because she will fight till the end to guard her happiness.

I saw your tears even tho you were trying to hide them, I wish I know what is in your mind.
Can you please tell me?
I saw your smile is as warm as the summer sun, I wish they are from your heart.
You told me they are because what you care is how you are living happily now...
I trust you. :) because as always, you bring a smile to my face~~

So now, I wish I am good enough to be your listener when you need a pair of ears...or else, I don't mind sitting just there to let you know that you are not lost and you are not alone.

It is snowing today in Bristol, light snow but gloomy weather.
Wai, you are not hot enough to melt the snow la!! see, it's coming down...

Erm, Tina monkey is in my room now too...Tina monkey is going to graduate soon...(Not that soon oso, a few months to go but when I come back from next summer, she will no longer be here~). Tina sis, I know you will never see this. haha!

Do you know that you left the college in hurry? I never get the chance to say goodbye properly to you also but I was glad I didn't say that much farewell words to you in the college because we met again here in Bristol. Now you are leaving again soon~~I will not say bye bye to you, I will see you again. I will see you entering another phase of your life and I want to be the good aunty of your kids!! haha and tell them how their mum has been a really good big sister to me who guides me and leads me well...Remember, I was once the Pendang girl who you led out from the dark...

Dear diary~~

2010-01-05T02:31:00.001-08:00

It's the 5th day of the first new year month and Wai Shan is coming today~~ =)

Shine shine, the Sun in Bristol...Shine up high in the sky as today is gonna be a beautiful day and tonight is going to be a GOOD GOOD NIGHT~~ =D

4th of Jan...another Maths-less day

2010-01-04T10:47:00.000-08:00

Maths, Math and bla bla bla...I always remember how I controlled myself to not to humiliate the headmaster in my secondary school. I might see him again next time...so ZIPPP~~ hahaha!! :D

Sunny sunny 4th of January, my 2nd day back in Bristol after a long long trip in Spain and Italy. Barcelona, Madrid, Milan, Florence, Pisa, Rome and Vatican City~~
You will always be in my memory... :)

So what did I do today? My life today looks really new and lively again. Received the postcard I posted for myself from Vatican City and the feeling of holding it is really exciting...haha~~ it follows me back from Vatican!! and it found its own transportation to come back to me!! :D

I woke up late today, talked to my parents then I set off to Asda.

Today, Bristol looks a bit different, it looks prettier and gorgeous...Everything means something and even the old railway on the road brings something into my head and I smiled, I have finally let go the feeling~~ but I will miss you always...I will miss how I think you are really cute in your own way.

Now, I know that £62 is really really heavy because that's what i carried back from Asda. On the way back, I laughed at myself, do you know that there is something called ASDA Delivery and with that amount of things that you are buying, you can get free delivery looooo~~~ ( what to do, I prefer doing grocery shopping myself rather than just giving strangers my shopping list...)

My bags were too heavy so I stopped by the harbourside to rest. After sitting down and have a good look at what is in front of me, I was knocked at my head again...today is such a beautiful day. It's winter and it's freezing cold but it is a beautiful day...

I am glad that I chose to walk home even tho the bags were heavy, ( or else I will not see how beautiful today was)
I am glad that I chose to say it out even tho I might lose a friend or maybe two, ( or else I will not know I can still be happy)
I am glad that I chose to always stay as your guardian angel even tho you might have forgotten the promise that I once made to you, (or else I would have forgotten how to love)

I am glad that I am back~~ I wish I can tell you all these...

Notting hill~

2009-12-15T12:49:00.000-08:00

I had an absolutely and gorgeous 21st birthday and it has been sweet and heart-warming... I wish all of you know that, I love you all so much no matter what's our past or what's gonna be our future...because I am loved and you are loved as well~~

Notting hill music CD, yes, I have watched this movie long ago...but I was too small to feel and to remember the details of the movie but I will say and I am sure, when I watched it that time, it was definitely my best favourite just like how it is now...

Totally fall in love with it and just like I said...
One day somehow, I will meet you somewhere and we'll feel something, something that no words can describe it...

Weird but sweet feeling~~

2009-08-08T20:25:00.000-07:00

1st of all, I found the dear diary. I should have found it long ago and i should have brought it with me to wherever i go~~ From now on, I will. It is not just carrying the friendship that we have, it symbolizes so much more than that. It somehow has become one of the light in my life, if you ask me why, I won't be able to explain it but I will say, it makes me cry whenever I read it. Thanks for doing that for me, it means a lot to me. A lot~~

One more thing I wish to do now, that is to look into your eyes and say, "I am sorry". Finally I want to face myself, please help me and guide me to escape, God...

_____________________________________________________________________

We just had a few conversation but somehow I wish we can have more~~ :) Keep going back to the same place just to have a look even though I am not sure if I am doing the right thing. I wish this can come true, the day dream I am having~~ :D In my heart, I am laughing at myself~~What a pumpkin head I am....

Decided to come back~~

2009-08-01T07:41:00.000-07:00

The End~

2009-07-14T08:44:00.000-07:00

Pens are weapons, words are bullets...

Words have lead me to the dark side of the world because I didn't choose it well...
So I decided to leave the dark side of the world, leaving everything that I had including the feeling and start a new life.
I might not own anything but I have myself...

This is the end of this blog.

Today is Thursday~~

2009-07-09T05:03:00.000-07:00

Saturday will be the day I travel alone to JB to meet my little small adorable pretty baby niece. More than excited to see her...I will be there till....the day before Jo Jie heading for home from Newcastle, 18th of July. I am sure I will get bored after 3 days but better than getting bored in one place.

(-.-")...wondering how's the management works in the committee? I should be busy with my responsibility in MSSA now but I am more than free in that case. Forget about it then.

(-.O)...New idea for education. Policy reversed but English hours extended for schools.

Wondering if they really know the reason for the failure of PPSMI?

Wondering why secondary schools are affected as well?

Wondering whose benefits are considered when they decided to reverse the policy?

Wondering why Dr M said yes to the reversed policy?

Wondering when will the TV station come to Pendang(sekolah2 luar bandar) to ask the opinion of the students here about the changing/setting of policy by the govt?

(^.O).......

Good Morning to myself...

2009-07-06T19:39:00.000-07:00

"Er jie, I am going out to buy shuttlecock," my little bro shook me and woke me up. "Okay," and I know I should wake up dy.

Brushed my teeth and can't stand the hunger after waking up early morning, I grabbed a currypuff and sat in front of the laptop browsing through Yahoo! website. Erm..."10 Boilerplate Phrases That Kill Resumes". Okay, might or might not be useful to me in the future(since I am a useless sponsored student whose brain has been half-blocked by the guaranteed job after graduating) but still having a dream to do better so I decided to copy and paste it here.

"The 2009 job market is very different from job markets of the past. If you haven't job-hunted in a while, the changes in the landscape can throw you for a loop.
One of the biggest changes is the shift in what constitutes a strong resume. Years ago, we could dig into the Resume Boilerplate grab-bag and pull out a phrase to fill out a sentence or bullet point on our resume. Everybody used the same boilerplate phrases, so we knew we couldn't go wrong choosing one of them -- or many -- to throw into your resume.
Things have changed. Stodgy boilerplate phrases in your resume today mark you as uncreative and "vocabulary challenged." You can make your resume more compelling and human-sounding by rooting out and replacing the boring corporate-speak phrases that litter it, and replacing them with human language -- things that people like you or I would actually say.
Here are the worst 10 boilerplate phrases -- the ones to seek out and destroy in your resume as soon as possible:
Results-oriented professional
Cross-functional teams
More than [x] years of progressively responsible experience
Superior (or excellent) communication skills
Strong work ethic
Met or exceeded expectations
Proven track record of success
Works well with all levels of staff
Team player
Bottom-line orientation
You can do better. What about adding a human voice to your resume? Here's an example:
"I'm a Marketing Researcher who's driven by curiosity about why people buy what they do. At XYZ Industries, I used consumer surveys and online-forum analysis to uncover the reasons why consumers chose our competitors over us; our sales grew twenty percent over the next six months as a result. I'm equally at home on sales calls or analyzing data in seclusion, and up to speed on traditional and new-millennium research tools and approaches. I'm fanatical about understanding our marketplace better every day, week and month -- and have helped my employers' brands grow dramatically as a result."
You don't have to write resumes that sound like robots wrote them. A human-voiced resume is the new black -- try it!"
Time to shower... ....

In the process~~

2009-07-06T09:37:00.000-07:00

When the courage is singing~ I listen to it carefully...

2009-07-05T05:00:00.000-07:00

When is the last time I see the rainbow?

Dated 19.4.2006, it is an audio dairy of Thembi Ngubane, a lady who introduced herself to the world with something she called her HIV prayer. She brings me into her life by listening to her diary, there is nothing more miserable that hearing someone telling us that we're dying. There is nothing more dissapointing than looking into the mirror every morning and realised that we no longer recognize who is in the mirror.

Deep in my thought, I went blank. Life is never predictable, life is never easy but there is nothing that can't be solved and there is nothing which will stay unhappy forever as we have dreams and hopes, and of course prayers...

I am one lucky girl~~ I keep telling myself...

2009-07-04T20:25:00.000-07:00

Jo jie asked,

Have you forgiven them?
I said and at the same time told myself,

No matter what people have done to me, they do not have to seek forgiveness from me because it's not me to judge whether they are right or wrong but I will never forget what has happened just to remind myself to not to do the same thing to other people because if I feel the pain, others will feel the same.

I told myself,
If there is pain, I want it to stay than healed because if there is anything that can cause pain in the future happened again, I feel numb and will not feel the pain again.

I told myself,

The more bad things happened to me, the more I should feel happy about it because God is helping me, God is watching me and He is leading me to be a better person.

Jo jie said,
*A lot; jie, xie xie ni*

I told myself,

They don't mean to do it to me. They are lost and because of that, they need more love and care from me.

Jo jie said,

I meant u forget means don't let the past haunt u n make u miserable
If the past helps u to be better person, by all means go ahead
support u!

I said,

Thank you, God. You have sent me another angel, guide and light! You never stop loving me.

2009-07-03T22:36:00.000-07:00

My cute little niece~

Staring at the sun...

2009-07-02T02:24:00.001-07:00

If things are not as they were, are we who we are today?

Reading "The White Tiger"~~ Where can you learn the best lesson in life? When you stepped out from the classroom. When will your brain start working? When you close the book in your hands and start living on your own mind.

Fan is blowing wildly on the ironing table just right beside my study table...Kenny Chesney is singing in front of me, erm...country music and oldies are still my favourite. Finishing the book soon~~ waiting for jiejie to come online, she laughed a lot nowadays. haha! :)

Erm....the white tiger is getting a bit wild now, he is lost in the city and he is corrupted....erm...(getting a bit boring here)...

"Are you a man or a god?"
"Neither. I am just one who has woken up, and the rest of you are still sleeping."

Finished the book~~~should I start working on academic stuff?? Before lacking too far away, I think somehow I should start a bit bit...

Genting is never my first choice to have fun or relax. Maybe my fun is not born to be there, haha! Anyway, I will say in most cases my fun lies where my friends are especially friends who laugh and smile a lot.

Thinking of what to do next...

Photo taken in Newcastle. With me were Stuart and Jo jie. Stuart made me so angry that day, nearly cried but Jo jie was there so I swallowed everything and digested it well even tho it caused pain deep in heart. I guessed she understand how I felt...or maybe only jiejie will understand. If jiejie was there, I will just walk away but I have learned to accept how people look at me and what I am going to be, maybe I should learn how to react better. Hopefully Jo jie don't think I am a rude girl...

Time to sleep soon... :) Good night, my little cosy home...

When it reaches 28C in the UK~

2009-06-29T16:30:00.000-07:00

When it reaches 28C in the UK, I am here in 32C home country not understanding why are they so worrying about 28C when I can survive under 32C? Ya, however, I am half cooked.

Let's see what BBC said about the heatwave in the UK. Erm...

"People with respiratory problems should stay inside during the hottest part of the day,"
-http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/8122969.stm-

I am suffocating then~~~Help!!!

Aiz...What can be worse than 32C temp?? I experienced the worst on my first day in Malaysia. The fact is pointing into my face saying that "Ya, you are now in Malaysia!" with an evil grin. Oh shoot, my first night at home was a disaster.

I feel scared to recall tho~~ It was 10.30pm at night when I felt so sleepy and bored waiting for Jiejie to reply in Skype in the group conversation with Boonie. So, I decided to say good night and goodbye hoping that I will have a good night sleep with the familiar fan sound blowing into my ears. As I stood up, and lifted up my hands, i can't see my fingers...Omg, did I just faint? When I was still thinking what is going on( I was too sleepy and blur), my little bro shouted "No electricity(mei you dian!!!)!!!". You have got to be kidding me!!!!! I was already sweating with the fan blowing behind me and now, mamummy ar!!!! I rather pengsan now~~~

The troop of blood sucker started to march out from their hidden camp...bringing their sharpest weapon. Lizards seem to have lost their way in my house coz I don't see any of them since I came back(which is like 6 hours ago....) so my mum's little soldiers to defeat the mosquitoes are not there to help her so we can only equip ourselves with Ridsect!!!! hey, long time no see, ridsect!!

It is just so Malaysia to blackout for no reason. When I was starting to scold bad words to pihak yang berkenaan~~~ I saw sparks from not far away from my house then I heard BOmba, then police car... ARHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! itu tiang electric is burning!!!!! I am not thinking whether the fire will burn any house nearby or not, I am thinking that is gonna take long to FIX seeing that I am now in M.....(shut up, chuah sue Yin)!!! and maybe by the time it's fixed, I am cooked and ready to be served on dining table. k, Chilll chilllll~~~my bro and sis in Sabah and Johor laughed at me when I called for help. How lucky I am to have them as my sis and bro...

I sweated the whole night...and waken up by a big fan sound blowing into my ears when it's almost morning. I smiled and continue sleeping till another heart-warming morning call that reminds me of I am already in Malaysia woke me up again at 5am...you know, I know what is that larr~~~

Next post will be something about my time in Newcastle where I met and know Jo jiejie~~

Till then, happy surviving living side by side with mosquitoes and hot weather, Sy!

9 months being a foreigner, finally I am back to being a local~~

2009-06-29T06:48:00.000-07:00

Finally I am home, 6 hours 55 mins from Gatwick, London to Dubai then 7 hours from Dubai to Malaysia. Another 6 hours from KLIA to Pendang, Kedah and finally I am home realising that a BIG strange mouse is in my bag being left out by the owner and of course gheeezzzz....my things are with another larger strange "mouse". Prefer to settle that tomorrow after I have a good night sleep.

All the way from KLIA to Kedah, I have tasted food that I missed so much...Nasi lemak, Roti Canai, Jambu batu, jambu air, Bak kut Teh and Ca ye Dan~~ Gosh, I am like a hungry ghost which just landed in Malaysia from the UK.

I am so sleepy now. SO, so, so sleepy...no jet lag as it is now 3.03pm in the UK~~zzzzzz

____________________________________________________________________
It hurts although it is a joke. It hurts when things are treated differently out of love but the love is not to the one who got hurt. Even so, I smiled and laughed for the goodness sake of love to a friendship till the cut in my heart bleed till it's dried.

Screw myself~~

2009-06-13T11:59:00.000-07:00

Back to the normal mentality!!!
HOW???!!!
Dang me!!

Whatever~~

Erm~~

2009-06-12T15:04:00.000-07:00

11.05p.m., 12th of June.

I slept at 7++ today. I was thinking why?? I heard Jiejie calling me thru Skype and someone called me by phone but I was too weak to wake up from my bed to answer both calls. Sorry~~~ to JIejie and whoever called me by phone.

Let me see, why did I feel so sleepy just now? and so weak~~ (-.-") I think I know why...

4 plus, I went out to check my postbox. When I walked out and see the Sun, I feel so dizzy~~My eyes were about to close. When I came back from outside, I decided to cook something since I only had pancakes for the whole day.

So, I cooked . As I scared the pork will taste weirdly since I have bought it for a long time, I added some Shaoxing wine to marinate the pork~~ MANA TAU!!! I actually spilled quite a lot on it....(-.-""). What to do~~~it will be a waste if I washed it away so I just pour out some and continue with my cooking.......Then I eat, then I fainted dy lo~~ MABUK!!! hahahhaha!!!

K, will I be sleeping later till morning? Don't know~~
___________________________________________________________________
Sorry for not answering your call since yesterday. One, I was busy trying to figure out some solution and 2nd, I am in dilemma on something~~So I just don't feel like talking.

我笑看人间世故~

2009-06-11T07:23:00.000-07:00

That means in disappointment, I smile and look at what is happening around me. I smile at how ignorance the world can be, how human can be. What else can I say for the selfishness that keeps appearing from time to time?

There was time when you only think of yourself but we were thinking for you. At the end of the day, you are still thinking for yourself. Don't forget that the earth is turning every seconds as well at a fixed point and someday, you will realized that no longer there is someone thinking for you.

-Reminder of the day, 11th of June-

11th of June, the birthday of a person who is so important to me. She is the one who knows everything about me and she is the one who is always there when I need her. Happy birthday, dear~

We never fear to hold on to one belief that we both agree in that is to be ourselves. Face the world with honesty and courage, fearing nothing but just how the God will punish us if we do something bad. We forgive but never forget about what people have done to us because we can remind ourselves in the future to not repeat the same mistakes to others as we know how hurtful that will be.

You never fail to be there when I need you. You never fail to let me know that in this misty world, I am not alone because from time to time you will let me know that we are still holding each other to go on and walk on no matter how hard the road is.

______________________________________________________________________________________
*You finally make me realize that you have no difference from those.

Coming soon~~

2009-06-09T12:58:00.000-07:00

~THE JOURNEY tO tHe LaNd of DoCtoR~

"The best story ever written. Describing the every step of a little backpacker. Bringing you the best real view of a student studying abroad finding her own way thousand miles away from home,"
-Randomly mad Reader-

Tracking down the Doctor with instinct, courage and bravery. The spirit of an adventurer like the Doctor has made the journey of the two Mathematician-to-be unforgettable. Every single step taken has tracked them down to where the Doctor was. They were there in the NEW NEW world with jets flying above their heads. There were there where the LOGOS HOPE has made the bay a marvelous place to stay and see the hope rising. They even witnessed the most extraordinary building with the touch of aliens word. The courage of The Doctor helped them to walk further on to reach from the Millennium Era to the age where there are still Kings ruling the land of Wales....

Jiejie, I tell you something~~~

2009-06-09T12:56:00.000-07:00

you don't tell anyone Oooo~~
Jiejie will do very well in the exam.
Jiejie will be fine.
Jiejie will have sweet dreams tonight.
Jiejie is the BEST jiejie ever~~

I miss the distance~ and the life living in the city

2009-06-06T14:42:00.000-07:00

It is a rainy day.
Day with endless music and cheering,
Night with endless siren and traffic;
I miss the distance between us in the memory
where I can reach by just walking.
A silent night with you not far away,
at least I know I can reach you easily.
...
It is a busy night now.
No matter how colorful and cheerful the night is,
it is still an empty night
because the sun will never meet the moon
and the moon will always be a distance away from the sun.

It has been so long
since the sun and the moon are there
before humans even exist on the surface of the earth
the moon has been living under the reflection of the sun.
Maybe
there is a distance but
there is always a connection I hope
...
Will it happen?
One day when the sun refuse to shine on the moon again.
If it happens,
then the dark night will become even darker.
Is it true that
only the moon needs the sun but the sun never need the moon?

What a day~~

2009-06-05T14:24:00.000-07:00

Went up to Brandon Hill and town to make preparation for the 1st event of the new committee of MSSA, farewell party for the seniors who are leaving Bristol. All the best, people~~

Went for dinner with Bhani at Giraffe, a dinner with unforgettable happy ending~

Have been spending time editing photos for no reason. :D but kinda happy to see the work that I have done.

Haha, this is just for fun! :P

A few more but I think I better get back to doing something more important~~

2009-06-05T05:01:00.000-07:00

Singing my love to the art of rocks...

2009-06-04T17:04:00.000-07:00

Good night~

Bristol O Bristol...

2009-06-04T11:28:00.000-07:00

Dinner+Half of my dessert...
Dinner~~

The whole afternoon, I was thinking what to do. So I decided to view all my photo albums and get the places of Bristol out to label and maybe it can be used for the pre-departure talk in Malaysia soon. Edited and labeled.. this is the work done.

A few more to go~~

Sweet glutinous rice + Mango

2009-06-04T05:51:00.000-07:00

Sweet glutinous rice is always my favourite :D

Coconut milk, sugar and glutinous rice. Easy and nice. :)

To make it a little bit more interesting, I decided to add something on it and put into the fridge as my dessert tonight!

Mango on top!!!

Hehe......and ya, I am too bored so I decided to create a very ugly signature for my pics. Very ugly indeed...it is okay...shall fix it later.

Now I want to sleep!!! :P

pAcKiNg~~

2009-06-03T08:01:00.000-07:00

Spent the whole morning packing. :) Never feel so happy tidying my room...My mission! Empty the room. So now I have cleared my table, shelves and winter clothes. I have packed all the small little tiny things, now waiting to be boxed. :D

Talked to mummy. See baby again. Happy little baby to see her grandma, grandpa and two uncles(fat and thin...hahah).

Feel like making tempura chicken and prawn...if I am not too lazy later...

2nd of June.Night at the museum 2 ~~posted: early morning of 3rd

2009-06-03T01:24:00.000-07:00

The sound of the fan(actually it's from the construction site outside my window) early in the morning woke me up, giving me a little sweet dream of "I am already home". Suddenly I remembered that yesterday has not been posted in my little world. Mum, dad and bros should have arrived in Johor visiting my sis and little niece. This is the first time mummy taking the flight, she must be very excited or should I say nervous. haha :D Just like me taking my first flight straight to the UK, 13 hours flight full of excitement(sleep all the way, haha).

Night at the museum 2 took half of my 2nd of June away. Fun, nice but maybe a little less surprising on the plot of the story. However, it is still a fun afternoon spending time watching movie with all my gang of Mathematics. :D

Stuart told me that we have a long and big summer plan. In my impression, I am only going to New castle and York, o..okay one more Lake District(which I don't really know where is that). Camping plan canceled because the weather is unpredictable and my biggest concern is there might be tiger coming to sleep beside me at night in the national park(Little mouse told me Lake District is a National Park). Then I was given the route plan of my summer holiday .

NEWCASTLE(18th June)-->LAKE DISTRICT-->YORK-->SCABOROUGH-->OXFORD(26th June)-->MALAYSIA(28th June) :)

That looks long tho...haha! k lo...but people PARIS straightaway wo...cannot, Paris must wait for Jiejie. Maybe after coming back from Malaysia. That 1 week will be my summer vacation with Jiejie. :)

Before that, I am going to Cardiff next Tuesday(9th June) for Doctor Who exhibition! and of course some other places around Cardiff. :)

Chatted with Stuart, him while I was watching Jamie at home and I think I want to roast a chicken or just anything like what he did in the show! So nice. Thursday, roast a chicken or grill Salmon! haha...k, Chuah, you better play sports or you are going to be a balloon when you go back to Malaysia.

Busy days ahead as the farewell party of MSSA is coming and lots to do which actually make me happy. :D Life has been a bit meaningless nowadays. K, I better get back to read books with some oldies playing across the room. Sometimes, life can be just as simple as that. :)

____________________________________________________________________

I do not know what to feel. You went away and you came back. After so long, I am strong enough to face anything that will happen. I am ready to accept anything so when you left, I have somehow decided to forget about the past and face only the future. I have decided to give up as well.Last two days, we were chatting like normal friend. A conversation between friends somehow make me feel more comfortable being with you. Suddenly you told me, you have given up and decided to come back. Why do you have to come back? Because I have decided to leave.
I am not going to hurt you again. This kind of distance where I don't answer your question is the best for us. Mainly because I don't even know how to answer my questions.

Blood is thicker than water, Love is thicker than blood

2009-06-01T01:05:00.000-07:00

She was born in Kansas City
Raised in Arkansas
Fell in love with an ex-Marine
She already had three babies
He had one of his own
They came together
For another and me
Our family never shared
The same last name
But our family
Was a family, the same
(And they say)
Blood is thicker than water
Oh, but love is
Thicker than blood

Wreck out on the highway
Rain falling down
Lord, he must have
Fell asleep at the wheel
There's a number of people
Just standing around
Lord, I can't condemn
The fear that they feel

For that river of red
Could be the death of me
God, give me strength
And keep reminding me
That blood is thicker than water
Oh, but love is
Thicker than blood

And if blood is
Thicker than water
Then what are we fighting for?
We're all sons and daughters
Of something that
Means so much more

I see it on my TV
But I can't understand
Lord, it's one
Big contradiction to me
How in god's name
We love thy neighbor with fists
In our hands
And kill each other
When we just don't agree

Why can't we see the walls
We can't see through?
And see what God's
Been telling me and you
(And that is)
Blood is thicker than water
Oh, but love
Love is thicker than blood

To you,

Thanks for listening and thanks for the song. It shall accompany me when I need it. Family is everything and no matter what has changed, family will never change. Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I don't mind being seen as a friend only when you need me. I will be more than happy for that because I can see you and help you to be out of trouble.

Picnic, picnic on Brandon Hill...31st of May

2009-05-31T11:27:00.000-07:00

Finally, I can do something very spring+summer-like activity. Picnic on the Brandon Hill and enjoy the sun that has been torturing well during my exam(for example, giving me a wonderful and beautiful sunny day before my exam and give the feeling of picnicking than sitting for exam.)

How crazy I was watching shows till 3am yesterday. In the middle of the night, suddenly I remembered the soaking glutinous rice, have to set 7am alarm to wake up and pour the water away. Then got back into my bed and slept till 9 before I woke up and started my "Ba zang+lo mai kai outlook" cooking.

Stuart and Siau Wen came at around 10.30a.m and the kitchen became so noisy because of Stuart! See o...Noisy! haha! Around 12, called Shanray to join the party and so there we go, climbing up Brandon Hill and had a good nice picnic there viewing Bristol that have accepted me as one of its people for almost a year.

(Brandon Hill, we were up there near to the Brandon tower...)

On the way of climbing up, met Minah, Nadia and Hani who were studying there. Aih, pity medical students. After enjoying the fun of calling themselves a second year for weeks, they are now have to face second year exam after everyone has finished their first year exam. Haha! (Stuart, see see, I am talking about you!:D, who asked you to use the christmas buggy thingy to knock my eye!) K lo, at least we promised that we will only have seaside BBQ after your exam. :P

(Kiwi and mango(covered by kiwi), Ba zang+lo mai kai outlook, black fungus salad...)

After eating, we played freebies which nearly "killed" the people who were picnicking around that area. haha! :P Then we climbed up to the Brandon tower which actually has been closed down due to the cracks on the building.

Sitting in the nature, putting studies and everything behind. Talking and singing all the songs that we have heard during our childhood, and ya, all the classic songs, what can be happier than that? Although I don't have much childhood that I can share but Shanray and I did find a similar cartoon hero that we had when we were kids. Maybe it was not Shanray's cartoon hero but it was mine, hehe! “黑猫警长”(Black cat inspector)!! :D None of my childhood friends watched it before, I do not know why. I just remembered when I watched it, I was using the black square black tape with a white label in front of it. haha!

(Now I can watch it again in Baidu...haha!)

Then we spent 2 hours chit-chatting and playing at the playground before we called an end to our picnic today. :)

Had a great fun today!! ;)

____________________________________________________________________
I discovered the truth and the truth is hurt. I do not know whether to doubt or to believe. As a human, I have no right to judge but the truth has shown me that., no one can make me happy except for myself. I can choose to lead my life happily or lead my life in a miserable way. To you out there, I can only say, be sincere to everyone, be honest because if you don't, I will be worried but I will pray for you.

30th of May, the appearance of a SHOPPING MONSTER...

2009-05-30T13:51:00.001-07:00

Finally I can switch on music in my room, watch shows and wandering in the world of internet without feeling guilty. I have post exam dilemma(as Sharmilah said) and PC said I will be depressed soon for not knowing which movies to choose to watch and what to do during my free times. :) Indeed, it is true. Haha :D. Wake up early morning, lying on my bed. I was thinking what kind of meaningful things that I can do to make my life better than just eat, sleep, play and etc...Can't waste my life just like that right?? Erm...anyway, I will leave that ques to the next day to think because today I have a good plan ahead. Shopping, eating, cooking and playing in a day. What else can I do after exam right?

K, suddenly today I became a shopping monster. Haiz....Decided to have a change on my appearance I guess other than just T-shirt and long jeans. :) Bought a pair of new shoes, lots of shorts and baju and of course!! My baby niece's clothes!! :P can't be more than happy than this! I know there is another reason why I have such a high and strong determination to have a change.

Then, back in my room. Talked to mummy and sister, everyone is so happy seeing the baby's clothes. :D Erm, lucky little baby girl, she is loved very very much by everyone.

Cooked dinner, some simple dishes. Hopefully everyone is satisfied. Tomorrow only I will make the "without leaves ba zang" hahha! :P Then picnic on Brandon Hill....haha!

After dinner, we went to common room to play snooker!!! Watched Britains Got Talent and....again play snooker. :D After that day playing snooker at Mah's place, I seem to fall in love with it. Guitar is still at the side of my bed, gonna play it soon and must practice, practice, practice.

Took my shower, that marks the first day of mine after exam. :) A very tiring day...

Calculus..

2009-05-28T14:08:00.000-07:00

I hate you because you look so hard in the past years but at the same time, I love you because you are just interesting when I figure out how to solve you. Hopefully I can be calm enough tomorrow...2 and a half hour, i know it is always so short when I am sitting in the exam hall.

Gosh, calculus!! you are just amazing...the way to solve you, i just have to look at you at the right time and the right angle!!

God bless me please....

Duan wu jie kuai le! happy ...er....dragon boat festival!!

2009-05-28T05:25:00.000-07:00

hahahahhahah!!!!!!

Tomorrow final paper....Calculus. :D

Suddenly I feel like making chinese dumpling!!!! Who agree and who wants to join?? aiya, the most also I will get two people to support me. If these two don't support me, who am I gonna make the dumpling with me leh...

Tomorrow Shanghai Night. Still on? hahaha!

Then Calculus, easy or difficult? Mr. Yves Tourigny, I am calling you!! hello~~~~~ You are responsible in answering this question.

With the most stupid question and most childish act...

2009-05-27T11:42:00.000-07:00

I am just like a kid in front of you. Wanting to be loved and care.

I am just a kid facing you, expecting scolding as much as expecting to be pampered.
I am no more than a kid in front of you. Never think before talking, never talk when thinking.
I am acting like a kid, hurting you more than being caring as promised.
I am just like a kid before you, doing all kind of things to get more attention.

Just because I feel safe being beside you, I take things for granted.

I talked to LENG LENG!!!!!! 5 mins later, talked to WAI WAI...

2009-05-27T06:20:00.000-07:00

:D HAPPY!!!! I talked to Leng Leng on the phone for 20mins!!...happy!!! happy!!! happy!!!jumping!!!jumping!!!jumping!!!

gEt connected from the UK to Australia - 3 pounds something

tAlKeD to Leng leng -priceless
hApPy fEeLing -priceless
gEt Connected with best friend -priceless :)

Happpy!!!!! day for me...

ThEn I called Wai wai who is now in the college working hard for her A-level exam.. :) We spent 10mins saying "hello", "can you hear me?", "can hear ma?" then everytime wai wai tried to talk. The line will become blur. haha!!! pity her...DIGI is too lousy, what to do...haha!! :D So the conversation is full of "hello?", "erm..", "arhh..", "chhhhh(line not clear)..", "caaaa(again, line not clear).." :P

Wai wai, don't worry so much. Don't think about how hectic and crazy the timetable is. Now while you have time, grab it and revise to the maximum! "The secret" has its own hidden theory behind, when you think of you want something, your thought will trigger you to work hard to achieve it. The thought to achieve will push aside all the negative element that will demotivate you and so you will work to the maximum for one, the goal you want to achieve so your mind is working hard to throw away all the bad thinking dy, don't add summore! Believe in yourself and just move on(scared also must move on!! scared what, all your jiejie support you from behind), at the end of the day you will be surprised by what you can go through, what you can do and what you can achieve! :)

What I have and what I do not have?

2009-05-27T05:00:00.000-07:00

If I think of what I do not have, even when I have owned the whole world, I will still not satisfied.
If I think "what do I have?", I will start to appreciate.
If you think "what other people have?", that is called jealousy(1 better word, can't think of now).
If you think "what other people do not have?", it means that you are ready to give what they do not have but you have and that is called considerate.
In short, always think of what you have got, what do you have and not what you have not yet got and what you do not have.

So what have I achieved in two days?? A lot~~

NOW I am sure I have Lee Hsiao Leng in my mind, I couldn't sleep yesterday and suddenly Lee Hsiao Leng came into my mind....miss Leng LEng liao~~~Must be leng leng knows that I was sad yesterday so she was thinking of me as well, hahahaha!! thinking so much...

Remember~~~
I played badminton with Leng on the field...
I slept on leng's bed...
I stood in front of leng's window talking to her...
I hugged leng's lamb lamb...
I threatened to "kill" leng's lamb lamb...
I ate pizza with leng leng and lyn lyn...
I had dinners with leng leng and lyn lyn...
I slept on leng's sister room, Lyn lyn was there too...
I watched a movie with Leng Leng...
I went for DOE with Leng Leng...
I cooked spagetti with Leng Leng...
I slept in a tent with Leng leng...
I cried and Leng leng hugged me...
I made leng leng climbed the wall to find me...
I have a dear small sister,wai wai in the college with Leng leng and lyn lyn...
I had a BBQ for leng leng and the friends with Lyn Lyn...
I sang for Leng Leng with Lyn Lyn...
I hugged Leng Leng when she left the college...
I hugged Lyn lyn who was crying when Leng leng left that night...
I looked out from my chalet's window looking at leng's window...but it was empty...

Now, I am missing Leng Leng~If leng leng knows, she will be happy I hope :) rather than thinking I am getting crazier now after being tortured by exam which sometimes send me to the heaven then pull me into the hell next, then lastly send me back to heaven when the exam is over!!

what can I say...

2009-05-26T08:26:00.000-07:00

Stats and I, we are so close and yet we are so far. After getting A-level result, I had a good chat with my Stats teacher and mechanics teacher. I told them I can't believe that I got the result for further maths. Both of them laughed and said, "we never doubt". What can I said except for, I also can't believe that they had such great faith on me. I remembered Pn sheila saying that, " you have a strong basic." I told her, " but I got blank in the exam hall when I was doing stats." She said,"you are putting too much stress on yourself and that's why."

Stats and I, since college have been bounded with a spell. A spell that will make me gone blank when I am sitting in the exam hall facing the paper. Today again, it happened. However, no matter how blank I was. I tried my best and here I am, sitting here blogging. Remembering what I have promised myself before I came here and I said, "what should I do now, rethink what I thought? ". Yes I think I should.

If tomorrow don't have FTA, today I will be sitting on my bed facing the ceiling and talk to myself. Tomorrow FTA...what other choice do I have except for start "eating" FTA up?

Woolala...

2009-05-26T04:21:00.000-07:00

Woooolalalala~~~lalalabubulalabibilalala....er....bibibububalabala...wooolalalalalala~~~

bulabiboolababababala!!! bubulalabababibi! bi.....bububobobulubulubulabulabulo!!!oooo..

obububu,bibibulabibulababo!

baba!

hungry, hungry, hungry...

2009-05-25T09:09:00.000-07:00

Cooking nasi Beriyani... :) Now continue studying while waiting for it to be cooked. OOOoo...my stomach is making noise. Aiyaya...I am better and better in wasting time. Haiz...

Noticed a crazy element in FTA past years...and someone gave me a smile early in the morning! :)

2009-05-25T04:59:00.000-07:00

The proof can take up to one page. The good thing is we saw it before in the notes but I WILL NOT REMEMBER it if I don't understand it. However, it is good if I can understand it and I will be able to do it but proof in 1 page??!!! errr... I can do it!

A message from Wai Wai, :)..nothing more than a smile on my face when I saw the message you left me. Thanks! I miss you too~~ :D Jia you o! All the best in your exam! :D Jia you jia you!!!! I can't wait to go back. I can't wait to go back!!!

Can imagine....Tina is now at home.....(er...how long dy har...should be more than 13 hours dy right?) eating her mum's cooking...lying on the sofa, watching TV. Holding phone messaging her "friend" then eat and sleep, eat and sleep, eat and sleep(become fat fat!!! in less than 1 day,hahah!!!)...hahha then can imagine how happy her bro is seeing the MU's jersey and cap...then HELLO~~ CHUAH SUE YIN!!! STUDY!!!

That's me pointing at you and that's my bro.

2009-05-24T04:39:00.000-07:00

Finally bluetooth is wroking on my laptop. I can get photos out from my phone! FINALLY!

That's me pointing at you and the one in red is my big bro. After so long, he called me the day before Analysis exam. haha. I think he misses me so much, hehe!

My bro is always so cool at home and always scold me but he gave me a lot of surprises by giving me lots of support when I needed it when I was in the college. He even got angry sometimes for me. :)

We both love this picture. haha! :D We even thought of going back to the same place(just beside my house) and snap the same pose again. OMG, just imagine me posing like that. HAhahah! K, I am not going to put that in my mouth! haha!

Hehe, he chatted with me and showed me that he went Kundasang then he described this very nice, that very nice...er....want to make me jealous la tu!!! :O Then that's Gunung Kinabalu behind, bangga la tu.

oo...that's our first picture together after SOOO LONNNG. That took place in Langkawi when we both went for holiday in Langkawi with Eilyn jiejie and the family.

The church bell stopped and the traffic has begun. People coming out from the church and daily routine is continued. So do I, have to get back to revision. I always say the same thing but got distracted super easily.

The church bell is ringing...

2009-05-24T04:13:00.000-07:00

The road is so empty today. I was waken up not by the heavy traffic outside my window which happens everyday but the emptiness of the street on this Sunday morning which is exceptionally EMPTY. 8.30 am...not a car or people walking. 9a.m, still lying on the bed but my ears were opened wide feeling the air flowing. This is the 1st time I feel the peace and calm. Thinking of Tina who is now on her way to London, then the airport taking Emirates and on her back to Malaysia. I miss home......With the three papers waiting, I have to control my emotion.

In my mind, I remember I haven't reply Shahira's email on the accommodation. I am still thinking which will be the best for her.

The church bell is ringing, it has become my company every Sunday morning till noon. I feel calm listening to it with no reason. Trying to imagine the scene where jiejie got baptized, I wish I could be there. :) Remember the day we went to search for white dress together, can see how happy jiejie is, waiting for today to come.

K, get back to revision. A few days to go before I can announce that I have completed my first year like how PC announced to me that he has finished his! arhhhh...... :O

*The photo was taken when Jiejie was here in Bristol and went to the church for Easter.

Received the happiness...

2009-05-23T12:51:00.001-07:00

I received I Squared few days ago. Haven't got the chance to read it but now, since I have 2++ days before my next paper, I read one of the article. Nice!! :D Happy to find a magazine that I can spend my time on just like during my secondary school which I totally put my free time on magazines like Dewan Siswa, Dewan Masyarakat and a chinese magazine called "中学生".

I Squared is a Mathematics magazine which consists of articles contributed by Mathematicians from all over the world writing of course about Mathematics. Interviews of great mathematicians. When I have time(after exam), I should start writing a notes on what I read so that I can make sure that I made every single pounds that I have spent on it worthy. :D

I just came back from badminton and a jokingly "farewell" dinner in GBK(Gourmet Burger Kitchen) with Tina, haha! since she is going back to Malaysia tomorrow while we are still here having exam. Fiizah, Stuart and Nazirul were there too. :) Had a BIG burger and fries.

Finally, I got the card in hand. Happy when I opened the envelope and saw the card in it. The note is printed in the card for me to keep or to send to someone. This one, I will keep it because the note in it will be a reminder for myself.

"A little rainbow I am now to see a smile on your face;
The sun I will be in the future to create rainbows just for you."

Talked to my sister and saw the little cute baby. Very cute. When I talked to her, she just had her "dinner". So, she was half asleep. When I called her, she opened her eyes a bit and then she closed back then she made her mouth into O-shaped and continue sleeping. Haha...very cute. She is now two-days old. ;D can see that she is a bit chubby...that she follows her mummy. Haha! Then I let the baby go sleep lo...

After two hours, my brother-in-law called and said baby woke up dy. Then we used like 5 mins to connect video call. By the time, the video call is connected. My bro-in-law said,"soli ar, baby sleep again..." -.-" haiz.....haha! what a cute little thing.

K, didn't do much revision today. Thanks to the baby. haha! No la, coz I wanted to see the baby so much and I can't concentrate in work and always see if my sister online. K, now after badminton and huge dinner, should get back to work and ready for high speed revision!

Have a safe journey back to Malaysia, Tina!!!!!! I am jealous. :O

BABY COME OUT LIAO~~~

2009-05-21T09:57:00.000-07:00

HAHAHA!!!!

New family member!! Baby come out dy..haha!!

Can't wait to see baby...

Mummy and baby safe...good... :D

Still waiting...10am UK time...21st of May

2009-05-21T01:58:00.000-07:00

Either my sister is still waiting or the baby come out dy and no one inform me because they know I am going to sit for exam today.

Just finished cooking my lunch, 2 dishes and rice in 25mins...fast! YEAH! haha!

K, need to study......so many things to look at and so little time left. Hopefully the format of the paper won't change. Then I'll be fine. :D

God bless my sister and me, and also my little baby niece. :)

11.45pm Uk time

2009-05-20T15:44:00.000-07:00

I called my sister who is now still waiting... Talked to her and she wished me good luck for my exam and I wish her good luck for her delivering...Haha...This is the first time we wish each other GOOD LUCK after being sisters for so long. :D

Feel happier when she sounded fine but a bit weak...Mummy said she felt the pain from time to time since yesterday, that's why she is now waiting there.

Baby baby, be a good girl...faster come out and see your mummy and daddy.

K, maybe when I wake up tomorrow morning. Someone who call me "aunty" will be there in Malaysia waiting for me to go back to meet her dy.

A BIT EXCITED....anyway, TIME TO SLEEP!...Analysis tomorrow, I can do it!

-Believe in yourself. You are more than who you think you are-

My sister

2009-05-20T12:56:00.000-07:00

My sister is now in the hospital waiting for the arrival of her new baby.

God I pray to you that both of them will be safe and sound. Let my sister give birth easily and have a healthy baby. I pray to you sincerely and please answer my call and make sure that both the new mummy and daughter open their eyes and see the wonderful world together with love, a new love born in my family.

Can't wait to listen to the voice of the new baby. Crying or shouting, that will be the sound from the Heaven, the biggest gift and love from the God.

Can't stop thinking about my sister now but I have an exam to face tomorrow. I will do my best to get good result.

Jie, jia you! Baby, jia you! Sue Yin, jia you!

A smile that cheers up your day

2009-05-19T16:33:00.000-07:00

A rainbow I am now just to see a smile on your face;

The sun I will be in the future to create more rainbows JuSt FoR yOu.

This is a card that I got for buying meals for 70 children. I have been thinking what to cook for dinner everyday. I have huge meal everyday but how about these children who always think "Will I have a meal for tomorrow?". A smile of them is just a smile. A true happiness grows sincerely from their heart. What is more meaningful than that?

I am now on my own. As long as I still can survive on a life as a student and human that I think I do not lack of anything, why not I share the extra with them right?

I risk my life posting this

2009-05-19T11:55:00.000-07:00

I think if I keep posting up this kind of photo, I will get killed one day and not only get bombed from phone calls. Haha! You know I am talking about you. HAhah! Aiyo, actually to reduce the quality of the photo so that it won't be so clear and focus, I am asked to use a phone camera to take the picture of my dinner. But then, I just realised that my laptop bluetooth device got some problem so I can't use my phone to take photo and bluetooth to my laptop. So, this is camera photo. :p

Oh god, my day is so not productive. Doesn't matter, I have a night and a day to go. I can do it!

In the mood of "Happily studying..."

That's deep fried fish in the middle with some curry paste and it is surrounded by prawns, squid, cauliflower, hotdog, seafood stick and mushroom in Teriyaki sauce. With rice, very full now......

Still looking at the rules and condition of adopting a polar bear. There are 2 schemes, not quite sure which to go for but will make decision after exam.

There was a band in my stomach while I was in Mechanics exam...

2009-05-18T11:23:00.000-07:00

Was thinking what to have for dinner when I was in the exam hall. Hahaha! No la, after finishing my exam. I did that k...Not that crazy yet.

Let's see, what happen before Mechanics exam on the 18th of May...I sent an email to Misha(my Mechanics lecturer) asking question on the answer given. The reply I got is "No worries. Good luck." I think he misunderstood my question. So the only thing we can do is, we told ourselves that thing won't come out. Mana tahu....got, but that thing is not significant. I still trust my Algebra is not that bad. So what do I think about Mech paper?? No comment. hehe....

I came back with an empty and noisy stomach. Talked to papa and mummy then took my shower then cooked...I was sooooo hungry before cooking and while cooking but then when I am done cooking my dinner, I feel full dy....What la you, stomach!! Weird...

Honestly speaking, I still can't find "exam mood". I think I left it somewhere in the luggage(brought from Malaysia). On my mechanics day, I woke up at 7.30-8am like that...then I revised a bit then at 9.45am, i slept again until 11am...then 12.30pm, went for exam...selamba giler...

Back to my dinner, that's Teriyaki Egg noodles...After so long, I cooked chicken today. Maybe because of that, I feel very very very weirdly full today...My stomach need to analyse the chicken 1st before digesting it..haha :D

CHUAH SUE YIN!!!

2009-05-18T04:16:00.000-07:00

Good luck and all the best for your exams!!!!!

What are the happy things that can happen to you when you are doing maths??

2009-05-16T14:54:00.000-07:00

SOLVING! ILLUSTRATING! APPLYING! EXPLAINING!

UNDERSTANDING!!!!

Plain but nice...Life is just life, how to lead a meaningful life?

2009-05-16T11:22:00.000-07:00

AGAIN!!! Dinner time...

In your eyes this is just a plate of fried rice...But it is prepared not in one wok but two woks, not in one step but many steps...

1st, potato is sliced and steamed with salt.
2nd, ikan bilis is deep fried in a wok with sugar and soy sauce.
3rd, carrot is stir fried in a wok then steamed potato and cooked rice are added in.
4th, deep fried ikan bilis is poured into another wok and egg is poured into the 1st wok to be fried.
5th, prawns, mussels and squid are steamed with thai style curry paste.

Egg done, put on a plate. Fried rice done, put on the egg and seafood done, poured on the rice...ONE PLATE OF THAI STYLE SEAFOOD FRIED RICE...

Life is just a word but how to lead a meanigful life! You need more than one day to put in more than just one effort!

Anyway, this is my dinner!

Did my FIRST ASDA oNLiNe ShOpPiNg...

2009-05-16T07:52:00.000-07:00

Hello~~~ Do you have to list down what you have bought here?? I am stressed because I don't have exam mood still..this is weird...very very weird. Exam on monday and I don't have exam mood on the saturday?!!!

	Product
	Young's Seafood sticks
	Jacob's Savours thins - rosemary and sea salt
	Tena Maxi night
	ASDA Naturally soft toilet tissue recycled
	ASDA Smartprice Eggs - minimum net weight
	Onken Biopot lite yogurt - strawberry
	ASDA Cinnamon swirls
	ASDA Toffee pecan swirl
	Sharwoods Cooking sauce - korma
	ASDA Pasta - macaroni
	ASDA Teriyaki sauce
	ASDA Raw tiger prawns
	ASDA Flat leaf parsley - growing
	ASDA Spring onions
	ASDA Semi skimmed fresh milk
	ASDA Chicken breast fillets (skin off) 2s
	ASDA Organic Garlic
	ASDA Baby leeks
	ASDA Cauliflower
	ASDA Chinese leaf

Erm..ya, I did this shopping with my mom. I was skyping with mummy then she asked me to buy this vege, buy that vege. Then she asked me to buy cauliflower, you know why? because cauliflower looks like a brain and it is good for my brain since my exam is near. Then she asked me to cook leeks, parsley and onion to eat. Again, you know why??because the name of one of this vege sound like "calculate" in hokkien so she asked me to cook and eat, good for my maths exam. Mummy, mummy, you are always so COMEL~~ hahaha!

K, StUdY and get MOODY, Chuah Chuah!! (no la, get some mood la....what get moody, siao ar)

CONGRATULATION to EILYN CHONG as the new TREASURER of OUMC(a society in Oxford University)!!

16th of May, a day to brave up myself to say A BIG THANK YOU!

2009-05-15T17:03:00.000-07:00

A good teacher is like a candle - it consumes itself to light the way for others. -Author Unknown
Teaching is not a lost art, but the regard for it is a lost tradition. -Jacques Barzun
Good teachers are costly, but bad teachers cost more. -Bob Talbert
The true teacher defends his pupils against his own personal influence. He inspires self-distrust. He guides their eyes from himself to the spirit that quickens him. He will have no disciple. -Amos Bronson Alcott
Teaching is leaving a vestige of one self in the development of another. And surely the student is a bank where you can deposit your most precious treasures. -Eugene P. Bertin
The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains. The superior teacher demonstrates. The great teacher inspires. -William Arthur Ward
A teacher's purpose is not to create students in his own image, but to develop students who can create their own image. -Author Unknown
What the teacher is, is more important than what he teaches. -Karl Menningervv
The dream begins with a teacher who believes in you, who tugs and pushes and leads you to the next plateau, sometimes poking you with a sharp stick called "truth." -Dan Rather
In teaching you cannot see the fruit of a day's work. It is invisible and remains so, maybe for twenty years. -Jacques Barzun
Teaching is the profession that teaches all the other professions. -Author Unknown
The best teachers teach from the heart, not from the book. -Author Unknown
"A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops." -Henry Brooks Adams
"Teachers, I believe, are the most responsible and important members of society because their professional efforts affect the fate of the earth." -Helen Caldicott
Better than a thousand days of diligent study is one day with a great teacher." -Japanese proverb
"The whole art of teaching is only the art of awakening the natural curiosity of young minds for the purpose of satisfying it afterwards." -Anatole France
Those who educate children well are more to be honored than parents, for these only gave life, those the art of living well. -Aristotle
A gifted teacher is as rare as a gifted doctor, and makes far less money -Author unknown ( This is COOL~~)
Teaching is the only major occupation of man for which we have not yet developed tools that make an average person capable of competence and performance. In teaching we rely on the "naturals," the ones who somehow know how to teach. -Peter Drucker
"To teach is to learn twice." -Joseph Joubert

HAPPY TEACHER'S DAY to all the teachers(including my parents who are my parents and also my teachers, my sister and my brother) in Malaysia!

The saltiness matches the plain rice perfectly

2009-05-15T11:30:00.000-07:00

Dinner time is the most interesting time in a day with exam waiting there with the evil grin; How miserable I am to be scared of exam...Exam in my opinion is the best weapon created, no one never fear of it. Even today you are standing high in the eyes of the world, I am sure exam once was your biggest enemy.

Today's dishes... Egg with dried prawns(the smell is the best and the taste is as wonderful), steamed fish with celery and onions(very chinese style, the aroma reminds me of chinese style stir fry squid that my mom always cook), steamed vege+lap cheong(chinese sausage, hehe :P).
As I steamed the lap cheong on top of the cabbage, the sweetness of the lap cheong is all over the cabbage, wahhhh~~~ ( Mouse, mouse, don't jealous o!)

Dinner done in half an hour, my mom said I am as fast as she is. Haha! Of course, I am your daughter k! hehe!

My sister will give birth soon, in a week time, so roughly during my exam weeks. Jiejie, I will pray for you. Give birth to a CUTE CUTE niece for me o!!! :D

What's in my mind now??

2009-05-14T14:23:00.000-07:00

LINK..LiNk...LInK...this equals to this, that equal to this and use this to prove this and from here can see this and that.

From the 1st and second, can prove the third. From here we know that, to prove T as injective, we can use nullity T=0 or one-to-one function but very unlikely because if we use nullity T must be zero, we can get the main theorem, dim V=Nullity T+Rank T to prove that if m=n, then T is surjective iff T in injective. (1st, if m>n, T is not surjective; 2nd, if m W, dimV=dimW if S is a bijective linear transformation. The main theorem is used again in the proof. How... dimV=dim(S(V))+Nullity S. We know that S is injective so Nullity S=0. Therefore, dimV=dim(S(V)) and since S is surjective, S(V)=W. Hence, dimV=dimW.

Then comes in T:U->V is a linear transformation. We have to show that rankS.T=Rank T. How... RankS.T=dim(S(T(u))=dim(S(v))=dim(w)=dim(v)=dim(T(u))=Rank T.
___________________________________________________________________

T is a linear operator where T:V->V and we have a belong to the set of real number then we write T(v)=av. a is the eigenvalue of T with v not equal to zero vector and v is the eigenvector of T assoaciated to the eigenvalue a. (If v=0 then all values of a are eigenvalues).

We say that v, w are the eigenvectors of T associate with the eigenvalues. Then, for example dim v=2, so we think of {(1,0),(0,1)} as the basis. So we write a 2x2 matrice to find the characteristic polynomial of T associated to one of the eigenvalue with eigenvector v. The other part of the C.polynomial has to be formed from the eigenvalue with recpect to the eigenvector w. (Past year, Claire asked).

BIJECTIVE LINEAR TRANSFORMATION=ISOMORPHISM, so to prove that T is isomorphism. HAve to prove that T is LINEAR TRANSFORMATION and T is BIJECTIVE.

What is linear tranformation? T is a linear transformation if for v,w in V, T(v+w)=T(v)+T(w) and for a from the set of real numbers, T(av)=a(T(v)).

AND SLEEEPPP~~~

I am posting this while I am eating it

2009-05-14T11:22:00.001-07:00

2 challenging weeks to go through then HOME!!!

The food that I miss the most is STEAMBOAT...yup, at home, my mom always prepare steamboat for us. The main reason is it is the easiest food to prepare since my mom has to wake up early morning to cook and go to school but that's not why I miss steamboat the most.

The main reason is I miss the time when my whole family gather round the small steamboat and have a nice meal together. We talked and laughed around that steamy wok and had a great time together! That's why I miss steamboat the most. I remember whenever we had steamboat, my bowl will be full of vege, fishballs, eggs and noodles then we will keep putting food into our bowl until all of us can't afford to eat the last fishball in our bowl.

So, today I cooked this. Vege, mushroom, egg, prawns, squid, carrot, potato and noodles with the soup cooked with ikan bilis. Then the vege is steamed because I like it to be steamed with soysauce and seafood, steamed vege is always nicer than frying it or boiling it, TRUST ME!!!! heheh :D Potatoes to make the soup thicker then TA~~~RA~~~MY DINNER!!!

p/s : Yee shan, that's your plate.hahah! i couldn't find a better plate to put and my bowls are too small so i have to use your plate. All your things will be returned to you after exam...hahahhahahah!:D

SaMe FeELiNg aGaIn...

2009-05-13T14:10:00.000-07:00

This feeling will never disappear...This somehow has become a tradition no matter where I am, who I am today.

There is always something that can only be told behind me and there is always something that I can't know.

Even when it comes to someone who I really trust and want to trust and make a close friend of mine. I thought the trust is built up but lastly, I discover that my trust has been betrayed again.

Everything is just within my own imagination and that's it...

What else can I say except for I am hurt...

I should not bother about this anymore and will not place hope again, you can talk as much as you want behind me and you can say so much silence behind me. I will just keep smiling as I know the earth is still moving.

1.37am...

2009-05-10T17:37:00.000-07:00

I am stressed but I understand Analysis one step forwad...At least now I see how does it go and I see the application of it in a wider perspective. All thanks to jiejie who patiently explained everything to me although jiejie has got really really tired due to her own workss(this is what i meant with the sentence before). I am sorry, jie. You know since college I am a slower learner compared to anyone else. I can't catch words fast and sorry...I feel bad too but to learn I have to keep asking. Sorry and thanks.

Mean Value theorem, Rolles Theorem and Intermediate value theorem...These things are just amazing! Will say more about them tomorrow, not now...

I have class at 10am tomorrow and I hope I can wake up early...I just realised that FTA got homework. I don't think I want to sacrifice my sleep for that. I will stay in the library tomorrow to finish it and hand it in.

Now, time to sleep.

I have done Calculus and I realised that MECH, ANALYSIS and LINEAR ALGEBRA will come first in the first week of the exam. Those 3, none of them that I have finished revising. Did I waste my weekend?

I didn't fully utilized my second last weekend but I did revise some...at least now when I open Analysis paper and linear algebra papers...I can do half of it but Mechanics is still a pain in me...Whenever I think of it, I feel like I am dying.

In short, I am not yet prepared for exam.

Right-hand limit for zero and [0,+infinity)

2009-05-10T14:57:00.000-07:00

How do you define Right-hand limit? Right hand limit for zero is x->0 and x>0.

How about [0,+infinity)? Simple. From zero to +infinty where zero is included but not infinity as infinity is just a term but not a number. Here we can see any x in the interval [0, +infinity) is greater or equal to o (x>=0) so what is the difference between Right hand limit for zero and the interval [0, +infinity)?

The answer is VERY DIFFERENT !

What is so important about this? It is very important. How? K, how do you determine whether a function is continuous at a point? Let's review a theorem, if f is differentiable at a point a then f is continuous at a. It is the same as saying if a limit exists at that point then the function is continuous at that particular point. Erm...do correct me if I am wrong because this is very crucial...Non-Mathematics student, do not try to comment about this, I can't take it if you say I am wrong when you are not learning it. I will feel very stress....

K, How to find a limit of a function? One of the most useful way is L' Hopital's Rule especially when you realise that your function tends to infinity for some ridiculous reason. I guess everything is fine till now.

Then we have the next question is it right differentiable or left differentiable? if you think you are looking from 0 to +infinity for right differentiable then you are wrong! You are actually looking at right hand limit!

Maybe when you read what I have written down, you will say YES! I can see the difference but think again, they are from a mind that have understood what is going so definitely you can understand. Just like one day when your children are reading the maths book that I write. They will understand. HAHAHAHA!! :D

If you don't understand what I am saying, I will say just ignore this post because I am writing this to kill my time and make you kill your time by reading it!

The second last weekend before exam...

2009-05-10T05:36:00.000-07:00

ALERT! ALERT !Chuah Sue Yin! It's the 2nd last weekend before exam and what are you doing?? Wasting time with no purpose?? Are you crazy? Therefore, when I can concentrate fully, I will forget about eating and taking my shower. I will do my revision like a robot until my stomach shouting for help during dinner time. Erm...what to eat? I didn't go to Sainbury's before weekend and when I am in the room I am so lazy to climb the "hill" early morning just to get some vege and etc. So, let's improvise...

I have egg noodles, carrot that I bought days before, dried mushrooms, frozen codfish, thai style red curry paste, leftover cabbage and celery and dried fish stomach(I don't know the proper name of it) from my mummy, imported from Malaysia by Air parcel. :P

So, I decided to cook " Dried mushroom and fish stomach egg noodle soup" and "Thai style steam fish with celery". :D

"Dried mushroom and fish Stomach egg noodle soup"

"Thai Style Steamed Fish with celery"

Totally forgot that the curry paste is salty on its own so I added soy sauce before steaming the fish and turned out a bit too salty but luckily it tastes still fine because frozen fish is a bit too tasteless if compared to fresh fish.

K, full dy...That's yesterday's dinner and I finished up all the vege dy except for carrot and some potatoes~~ What to cook leh for tonight....EI!!STUDY, STUDY!

Last meeting of my first year GUITAR CLASS

2009-05-07T13:32:00.000-07:00

"Auld Lang Syne" ends my guitar class today, it somehow indicates the nearly ending first year of mine. Just left exam to go through and so there goes my first year in the UK. However, the last day of my guitar class has somehow started my interest in learning to play snooker! haha :)

Mah(my guitar instructor) has become my snooker instructor as well for today, first and final session of my snooker class and I can pot in a few balls dy and HAHAHA! happy~~

Bhani! let's have a snooker party after exam! :)

So, what songs have I learnt...Birthday song, Auld Lang Syne and Hallelujah! Erm, due to revision and homeworks, I didn't have time to practice and so I am still playing one note by one note and compared to a Korean guy in my class, his name Wan yang if I am not mistaken, I feel so so sad because he can play very well dy although we started the lesson together. That is the priviledge of being a postgrad student, he doesn't have exam and he said he practices guitar for hours per day and that is so unfair! :O

Guitar and now snooker, so gonna stay in the common room to play snooker everyday after exam! hehe :D

K, STUDY! CHUAH SUE YIN, JIA YOU!!

I think I am starting to like further topic in Analysis! so much magic and tricks that can be done and I can't wait to master it! WOOHOO!!

Spicy, spicy food~

2009-05-07T06:27:00.000-07:00

Due to the exam stress I guess, I feel so in love with spicy food. I am not sure why, maybe I need to spice up my urge to study and revise more. Yesterday, I was too busy to cook, I went to an Indian shop to take away a nice box of chicken curry+vege curry rice. It costs me 5.50 pounds(which is roughly equivalent to RM30, gosh, why am i converting?). K, but I felt happy having such a nice lunch. Oh ya, actually Stuart asked me to go to his place for a nice plate of Satay sauce pasta. Sorry lar, Mr. Stuart. I was too busy yesterday. I don't care, you better don't finish up your sauce and I will want to eat that after my exam. :)

Today lunchtime, I went to Sainsbury's with Su after my tutorial. Then I came back and decided to cook myself a decent spicy lunch. Yum~Yum~, it came out much much better than I thought and again I am amazed by my own creativity(perasan siot~~haha). K, this is my

"THAI STYLE CURRY PASTE STIR FRY FUSILLI".

Erm...of course not to forget to show the main character of the dish and something that is not dissapointing from Sainsbury's.

Try it and you will find out that the paste especially is not dissapointing at all! I will say it is as good as the steam fish sauce that I imported from Malaysia through Air Parcel (only Lyn tasted that before so maybe only she can imagine how good this paste is).

The sweetness from Cauliflower and Brocolli with the nice smell of the lemon grass and coviander in the paste together with some sliced dried cuttlefish soaked in water is definitely the nicest stir fry fusilli I had.

My cooking itself is not that good but if I am lucky, sometimes I will able to find nice ingredients to be put together then a nice dish will come out easily.

Erm...full dy so NOW it is time for me to gather all the knowledge of mathematics and make sure that I will be able to create some flying colours in my exam! :)

Of course, without a nice cup of milk tea after my lunch, my afternoon will never be perfect.

By Eilyn, Bubbly Rhapsody...Power of Love~

2009-05-05T15:11:00.000-07:00

Thank God

for awarding me

friends that are oh so faithful and caring

protecting me from danger

waiting for me to catch-up

inspiring me to be great in thoughts, equal to theirs

and understand the angst in me.

Thank God

for sending to me

angels-in-disguise

that remind me to pray silently

for others, our loved ones and ourselves

and constantly pull my hands gently

to join the wonderful prayer of love

Thank God

for the little happiness that come upon me

through people near or far

reminding me to give and take

to share and to pray for the good of all

Thank God

for the wonderful family I have

though incomplete,

yet its completeness can be felt from within as

I remember those who join Him in Heaven

Thank God

for giving the courage to resist

the temptation of hell.

for answering my call for help

and to forgive the wrongdoings of others by his

POWER OF LOVE~

Every picture tells a story...

2009-05-05T14:21:00.000-07:00

This is Bubu. Just like me, Bubu is from Kedah. However, Bubu has to live alone since small and Bubu travelled alone and one day, Bubu reached a small island in Kedah called Langkawi so Bubu stayed there in a shopping mall until one day...

Two silly girls went for holiday in Langkawi and one of the little tiny girl saw Bubu and liked it. The bigger sized girl decided to bring Bubu back and so since then, Bubu lived happily ever after with the two silly girls in KYUEM. Currently, Bubu is staying in Selayang. Bubu can't fly, sorry k, have to leave Bubu alone at home. Big BUBU is going back dy and can keep Bubu accompany dy so Bubu sabar k.

As we know, no one is perfect in this world. Looking at Bubu, we can see that Bubu got one eye lower than another. Even so, Bubu remains cute and faithful to the two silly girls. Tears, laughter, sorrow and dull, Bubu was always there and never leave, never talk, never scold, never shout at us for being silly or being childish. Bubu always look at us until we realised our own mistakes.

Surprisingly, I still remember when is this photo being taken. It was during a long weekend when big Bubu went back home. Then , that time just left me alone in the college so I asked Big Bubu to let Bubu stayed with me. Unwillingly(not the truth), big Bubu let Bubu stayed with me for the weekend since Big bubu also pity me and so there goes the long weekend where the Orange Guy took over the job to make sure I take my meal on time.

Do you know why I remember?? becoz.....

Big Bubu went back home and didn't come back on time as promised, so I decided to take Bubu's Butt and show Big Bubu to protest! :P

Actually Bubu lead a very pitiful life in the college, always live in fear because there are more than one kidnapper in the college. One is me and one more is "BIBUBIBU" !

Bibubibu also got a bear which always become the target to be kidnapped and so this is a fair and square kidnapping incident. No mata-mata involved, you will only see the kidnappers run out from the room of the victim then the next thing you will see is the victim running out from the room and knocking on the kidnapper's window... :)

This is a circle of love so when the circle was going on round and round, there were no lifeform being sacrificed, it only generates more memories filled with lots of love. :)

A smile on my face at last, remembering all these...Thank God for creating such thing called memories! :')

Revising for exam...Mathematics makes me think of you...(edited)

2009-05-03T12:44:00.000-07:00

Again, all the works in front of me is killing me. Looks easy to finish revising but the truth is it is so hard to digest them well. I guess I am in a big trouble again. (oh ya, before I forget, Yee Shan I still remember you asked me a question but I still haven't got time to look at it, tips of the day to all of you, when you ask me a question, do not say when I am free then look at it, i tend to really look at it when I am free. haha :P and when am I gonna be free? Erm...let's see....bla, bla, bla...), k,k, I will look at it before Tuesday definitely, really sorry.

K, Mathematics= ?? for me now. Haha :D Sounds bad right, the thing is I can't accept it when I don't really understand it. Now, I miss Mr. B...... My beloved Pure Mathematics Sir...No matter how bad we did in the trial or exam, he always smile and he always think that we don't work hard enough and it is not we can't do it. Then after we have worked hard, he thinks that the paper is hard and it is not because we are not good. He is always so supportive and never stop telling us that everything is "easy~~" :'). Maths is always so fun for him but most of time I don't understand what he is trying to deliver to us in the class. He has a wonderland and he is living happily in it. How good if i can join him in that wonderland and make it a bigger wonderland for everyone. One day, I will. :D Sir, one day I will understand everything that you say and I will be able to say something mathematical that make you happy as well. HAHA!

These 3......are the person who helped me a lot in the battlefield. The mysterious orange guy and the thinker and the loud 1. Hehehe...I will never survive college life without any of you. haha! :P

One is the person who created miracle with me in getting "a" for my AS Econs yang cacat and most of my study. I can't imagine one day when I have to stop sharing happiness and sadness with you so I won't stop sharing. (Sorry la but even my mummy oso sayang you...haha)

Next is the one who scolded me in front of everyone for being childish and makes me think wisely after that. He never fail to make me grow up when I need to.( I make you sound so old right, purposely one...haha)

The 3rd is the one who never fail to be there whenever I need someone to talk to. The one who always say I can do it even when I myself have no confident in doing it. (Thava, I hate that pic but I can't find another 1 to replace that.)

What to do, what I am feeling now is so similar to the feeling before further maths exam and it makes me think of you. I told Pn Ju and Pn Sheila that I will not dissapoint them again and so I will NOT!!! I told myself that I will not allow myself to not understand again and so I will NOT!

I CAN DO IT!! and of course, my Leng Jie jie, so naughty but yet so special...We miss you lotsss...and I love you more! haha :P This girl is so naughty, she will never allow me to be alone. When I was hiding in the room, she even climbed over a wall to find me and catch me. She will never leave me alone... :'(. After she left the college before us, Lyn jiejie and the mysterious orange guy have to take over her job and then they had to run all over the college to find me hiding in the library. After being pampered for 18months by leng jiejie, I always hope that that two can find me whenever I hide myself up because Leng Jie jie never fail to find me. I am lucky, very lucky right? :'D

This is...Who is this har? Er...OHHH! ya, someone who hold my hand tight when I am surrounded by darkness and pain. She is also the one who asked me to think of her instead of thinking something that will make me cry and sad. She is ALSO the one who asked me how to make the eyes not swollen the next morning if she cries at night because in her opinion, I am the expert. (I took this pic, the previous 1 is not mine so I want to put this pic, she sure kill me when she sees this. Haha!)

Err.... -.-"

Lastly, a little something for someone who will kill me if she sees this. I think it is from 2006 before christmas holiday in KYUEM, Tina's room if I am not mistaken. Anyway, let me introduce to all of you, the biggest mangkuk in KYUEM. haha! Not fair if I don't say something about this mangkuk right...This mangkuk is my senior who lectured me until 2am in the morning because I felt inferior when I first arrived in the college. So, this mangkuk together with another big mangkuk(Fibi) are those who helped me to raise my head up in front of everyone.

K, everyone including myself...ALL THE BEST for the exam!!

When I realised that I am swimming in nowhere by myself...

2009-04-28T14:43:00.000-07:00

You don't really care, do you?

With my soul, with my heart I care.

I care but I do not have to show it in words, do I?

I care whether you do it with words or without words.

If you care, if you do not want to do it, why do you have to do it?

I just want to know whether you care.

Not like before you no longer care.

I told you even if I care, I do not have to say it out.

You will never stop, don't you?

Yes, I will never stop until one day you say it out.

Because until now our belief is still different.

I believe in every words count,
You believe in every action counts,
I never stop counting,
But you always forget that you have stopped acting.

Which is more important? Love or pride?

2009-04-27T08:16:00.000-07:00

I guess I fail to follow my schedule or fulfill any determination of mine to write a post a day. There are two possibilities tho, it is either I fail to be determined or I am not surviving( as I stated, I am to write a post a day to show that I am still surviving). Erm,erm...even I am not sure where I am standing now.

Which is more important? Love or pride? Whenever I switch on my laptop after I just got back from outside regardless of how dirty or sweaty I am, I can't wait to ask "are you there?". This is so much similar to what I always do at home. Whenever I am home, I will shout from outside before entering the house, "Ma!Pa! I am back!". Then if I don't hear anyone answering me, I will keep calling "ma!PA!MA!PAAAA!MAAAA!JIE!!! DUO PUI!!!!" until someone answer me. Then my dad will come out from nowhere and say I am calling like a calf finding for mummy cow. errrrr...ok..-.-"

I can't remember since when I have put the same habit to you. I guess it just happened but I am happy doing so. Sometimes, especially when I am moody, I will ask myself " why must I always be the one asking whether you are there when you actually don't care whether I am here?". One day with the thinking, another day with something else. If I can keep my mouth shut on the day I am moody then I can save a fight with you. If I can't, cry for 1 night, the next day, I will continue asking "are you there?". Then happily continuing the same routine again everyday. I guess the law of pride does not apply when I am facing you. I have to say sorry cause the principle of emo will never escape as it is built in me as much as Newton's Law is playing an important role in classical physics, I guess the principle of emo built me in the way who I am today(I know you think so... :P).

K, time to go for tutorial. I think I will be late. Die....RUNNNNNN!!!!!!

Less than 1 month to the exam...

2009-04-22T11:55:00.000-07:00

I really need to set what is the first and what is the last I guess. I will get crazy studying for the whole day, I am not used to that. So, I am just gonna maintain the habit of watching Doctor Who while I am eating dinner which I picked up during the Easter holidays.

Once in awhile some Coke or Ribena just to cheer me up and of course. 1 day a post just to remind myself that I am still alive. It is so weird to see that it is still so bright outside when it is already 8pm. Some people say it is good but I am like a bat, work harder when I don't see the sun. I guess this is something real bad for me. The good thing is I am half bat half human(vampire maybe, oh gosh, nonsense!), I can stay up till late and wake up a bit early to get ready for lectures.

Things are going smoothly but I am not sure if it is going as fast as I should but at least I am still feeling normal and sometimes got scared a bit. I think I can do it, as I always tell people around me to trust themselves that they can do it! I am gonna say this to myself now. A wish from Shahira(labu oh labu) before my exam during Easter hols reminds me of my dearest juniors in college.

We have a battle to fight! We have a battle to win. We can do it and I believe all of you can do it as much as I believe I can do it.

I fly high with the wishes from the one who love me and I love;

I fly high hoping that I can achieve a dream;

I fly high and believe that I can fly higher just to reach the furthest star,

But I learnt that I will be grateful when I reach the first star on the way;

I love to fly high but I will never forget to once in awhile look back where I come from.

You'll never walk alone. (Thanks, PC)

2009-04-21T12:53:00.000-07:00

Never come across my mind that football can be something that will bring everyone together, to love each other, to care for each other. It has never come across my mind that there is one day that a song to remember the Hillsborough incident will be something that make me realise that life is too short for me to stop and beg for sympathy from myself("Life is sometimes too short for us to stop and beg for sympathy from ourselves," PC said).

The mood and the song, they are enough to trigger my loneliness and tears that I have been kept long in my heart. Maybe it is a good thing to bring it out, just as you said, sometimes the loneliness will just creep in from nowhere. I was lucky that I was not alone at that time.

You said," sometimes I do think if I die in my room right now, no one would actually know for some time,". I was speechless. I think the same thing will happen to me too. Maybe one day when I start a journey on my own, no one will notice till I come back again. Then everything will be so normal for them but the fact is, it was not for me. Right?

Then you said," but come thinking about it, what difference does it make if ppl do know?
well, what much difference is there between dying alone and dying in front of others..
eventually we will have to move on and leave..we came alone, and we shall leave alone..
and there is no shame to walk on this path alone..of coz a company or two might make it more enjoyable..but eventually..we shall part..
not that i m contemplating to renounce or be a monk la..but its just that, life is just sometimes too short for us to stop and beg for sympathy from ourselves..,".

I was speechless again. People said we must always see our life with hope and light but why does it sound so realistic when you are actually looking at it so hopelessly? Is our life that dark? I can't deny what you said because it is true. Maybe it is time for me to move on and let it be.

Coke to cheer me up, I am having one now just to give a smile to myself. I need something that is special to move on and that will be a can of coke for today and tomorrow. Cheers, PC.

I smile, I laugh because I have a mask;

I talk, I cheer because I have a heart to make people happy;

I cry because I am awake and realised that I have nothing.

This has different meaning according to how you are looking at it. So do life, life is so uncertain and that a person might spend the whole life searching for the real meaning of life. So why do we have to cling on it so much and no point of us franticly searching for them. These things will come and go, and we have to stay put and let it be......

I remember every single words that you have "crapped". You do crap a lot but by them, you bring a smile to other's life.

By words, I lost a friend. I will always remember that and I shall talk no more.

Ah Lyn is back in Oxford and I am back in lectures, homeworks and tutorials...

2009-04-20T05:53:00.000-07:00

"have you done your homework?". First question for the new and final term of my first year. It strikes me right on my face, deep into my heart and it hurts. I haven't done any of my homeworksss and I am supposed to hand them in today. What else can I say if it is not "OMG!"...and "God bless me".

Today I have a good plan laid down by myself before I slept yesterday and readjusted before I woke up this morning. Here goes the plan.

1)Lectures (10am-12pm)- meet Yves and Ivor. (mana tau changed to meeting Leslie instead, haiz, what a good start for my new term.)

2) Senate house(spent 921 pounds for accom) - (Debit card is the best I tell you, it is less painful than paying by cash, agree? at least you can ignore how much you have spent unless you always look at your internet banking)

3) Library to return a book (Overdue!! spent 2.40, padan muka Chuah Sue Yin! -.-")

4) Library ( Changed to going to Sainsbury and home sweet home right after that.)

5) Tutorial at 5 p.m......(Opened my Uni mailbox, from Raquel(my tutor)

Imaginary dialogue
Raquel : How was it?(probability exam)
Me : It was not easy for me but I think i manged to do most of it except for...bla,bla,bla (Sucksss...you can read my blog to know the truth.)
Raquel : So, do you have any suggestion of what to do for the next tutorial?
Me : I am sorry. I spent the hols revising for exam and didn't do any of stats and L.A. I will revise now and ....bla,bla,bla...
(er....I don't have time to revise larrr...i Haven't do my hmwork lo...)
Raquel : See you guys on Tuesday for tutorial.

EI!!Tuesday?!! today is Monday!! Today got no tutorial! hahahhahahah :D

So now, I am sitting in the room. Facing my stats and Linear algebra and of course blogging.ha!

When it comes to an end, it reminds me of evrything...

2009-04-18T06:31:00.000-07:00

Easter holiday 2009 is coming to the end, I have finished my 2 papers (probability and NTGT). I still have two days to enjoy a bit before this sunny weather of Spring without lectures and tutorials left. I have 6 papers waiting for me but I guess resting for awhile does not harm.

Releasing myself from the lock of studying definitely has brought me into lots of miserable time-wasting behavior. With Lyn sitting beside me studying theorems and proofs, I can't stop feeling guilty but still my Analysis is still at its first page since morning ( Guiltyyyy~).

Swimming in the sea of guilt, I reached Seng's photo album during the winter trip and I found two pics that really write and describe the happiness that we had during the trip. Among all the pictures that I have gone through, I couldn't find one that really describe everything that the trip meant to me. These has potraited it well. All the photos that we had, all of us were either looks just normal or we were covered by the beautidul scenery along our trip.

These two pics have shown the smile, the tiredness and our appreciation towards what we had along our way. It feels good to have the feeling again. It feels good to have some same old feeling being framed in a form that will never vanish, that we will treasure forever.

I am glad that we have framed it well and I hope all of us will treasure it in our own fine way.

Winter passed and Spring is here.Time passes but the feeling and memories will never fade away.

The first thing I did after Probability and NTGT

2009-04-17T05:08:00.000-07:00

I will say NTGT is not as bad as Probability but it is still not that nice. However, I am happy for I have finished two papers and now I am sitting in front of the laptop, finding shows to watch and things to do. 1 and a half hour sitting in front of the laptop. I finally finished editting my Xanga and it is now ready to go(I mean it is ready to be posted blog on) and I editted the photos that we took when Gideon and Thave came to Bristol. Now I realised, Picasa is nice to be played with. Not bad, Not bad. Hahaha..

Now, Jie Jie is sitting beside me watching a documentary about the man who created the world of Narnia, C.S Lewis and eating Special K at the same time. Today is Friday, 1 more day then jiejie will be moving back to Oxford dy. Then my room will have just me again, the quiet and emptiness that I felt after my room&flat being invaded by Thava, Gideon and people from Winter Trip including the Mouse, the Duck Family will come again. This will last until 27th June I guess.

Erm, maybe earlier than that. Remember?? Jiejie's birthday, I will definitely not in my room. :) I will run away to other country. hahaha! Let jiejie sad.hehe. I am not that evil larrr....k,k...wana watch NARNIA oso..

In the battling with NTGT(Number Theory&Group Theory)

2009-04-16T08:23:00.000-07:00

16th of April 2009, this will be in the history for sure. Why? (C'mon , for sure 16th April 2009 is a past tense when you are in 17th of April 2009 rite?) er...Lame....

K, whatever.

I am now in a battle with NTGT which I think this event has enough value and meaning to be some historical event in the future as well. Just to make sure that the future generation has enough values to learn when they are reading this event in a textbook or my biography in the future. I decided to write down more about my battling with NTGT. I would imagine myself becoming THE DOCTOR and NTGT is the robot covered with balls around their body, DALEK.

In my mind, NTGT keep saying "exterminate!exterminate!", whatever DALEK NTGT! I am THE DOCTOR!! I will make sure I know where is main switch and I am going to get controlled of you and then you will know what happen next(Oh, that's how DOCTOR+DONNA) defeated Dalek!

A lesson to be learnt, knows where is the "main switch" of something you are learning and you will never fail to defeat and conquer it! Mathematics works well in this way. Knows what you are doing and remember what you have done, most importantly, understand what you are studying!! :D

Leslie made my day.......WONDER(?.?)FUL

2009-04-16T06:06:00.000-07:00

This is a letter to my dearest probability teacher, Leslie is his name. Sir is what I usually call him.
Here goes the letter.

Dear Leslie, Sir,

Today is the BIG day for probability. After learning probability for 3 months and ditch it for another 3 months, finally the BIG day to test the important of probability has come. Today when i was walking to the Great Wills Memorial Building, I was full of confidence because my jiejie said I sure can do it.

Then I have wishes from my Duck Family(Chin, Seng, Lyn jiejie), blessing from the 1st year 1st class student, tina, "all the best, sis" from Thava, my dearest bro and of course not to forget the "Hantam saje" wish from my crappy friend PC Wan( I took it as he is wishing me hantam saje, apa2 yang bagus in this world). Ok, enough of who has wishes me well because what I am going to say next isn't that well.

Today is a Wonderful day. Define Wonderful- Wonder(full of question marks) and full (just to emphasize the wonder) because you have given me the most wonderful paper that I have ever had in my life. However, I feel very happy and content. Now I see real maths and I have built up the determination. One day, when you give me that kind of paper, I will say this is just like drinking water. BUTTT, why you give it to me now, today as my 1st real exam paper in UoB?

However I want to thank you for letting me to think so much and now I am exhausted. How am I supposed to study NTGT for tomorrow's exam?

This is definitely a letter of appreciation. I appreciate your effort of creating such a WONDERful paper and let me see the REAL probability.

I wish all the best in the world, sir. Hope you will wish all your students all the best as well.

Thanks.

Regards,
Sue Yin
1st Year Probability Student

P/S: To show my appreciation to you, sir. I thought of throwing my pen to you but I am scared that others will do the same and end up hurting you so I keep my appreciation to you in my heart.

feeling angry is better than feeling dissapointed?

2009-03-30T16:13:00.000-07:00

Exam is getting nearer, yet none of what i should prepare for the exam enters my mind. Without the company of my own voice in this empty room, i lost my concentration as well to study and prepare for exam.

On that day itself, i stopped myself again and again to send a message because i know you long enough to understand that you will not have done it if you are not desperate or without a good reason.

Not saying anything is just not me. I dare to say but i do not dare to bear the consequences. I wanted to send but i can't accept if you do not reply.

" I think so...at least feeling angry shows how childish I am as always. feeling dissapointed shows how not understanding i am. i do still love u as my friend as usual, still care about u as much as i care about them but i admit i am childish enough to want an explanation for that just to make me feel better. I would rather we have a big fight and lastly i got scolded for how childish I am to have fought about something that is unnecessary. Now, I guess you don't even have time to explain yourself but to expect me to be understanding.
I do understand but when i think of what has happened and when i think of what might happen. I just can't stop myself being such a bad friend.

Although i sounded very not understanding when i said so, i do mean it sincerely when i asked you to rest well and take care."